I've disowned my blog for long enough. Starting Monday, i'm blogging every week. I promise!

See you all on Monday.

Don't forget to make someone smile today.

i'm super sorry!

I'm just going to finish out the 30 day challange on my tumblr.
I might not post on here for a while because i really want to get back into tumbling, but don't be sad, i'll try my hardest to post from time to time!

love you all!
and don't forget to make someone smile today. :)

day twenty four

Day 24: Your view on gay marriage

I'm a part of The Alliance at my University. I'm also a part of many other clubs at my Univeristy, and i have to say, being a part of The Alliance is the organization i'm the most proud of. I think every school should have an organization as such so everyone who have the same views, can congregate and talk about the issues of the LGBT&S community. Me being a straight female, most people are kinda apprehensive about why i'm in the organization, but the LGBT community needs people like me. People that don't have the same sexual orientation as them, but understand them, and don't bash them for simply just being who they are. So with that said, i am a huge supporter of gay rights. Love is love. No discrimination needed.

But I let my heart go, it's somewhere down at the bottom...

...But I'll get a new one and come back for the hope that you've stolen

day twenty three

Day 23: Your current relationship status, and how you feel about it.

I suppose you can say i'm in a relationship. Ryan and i are exclusive because we're not doing anything with anyone else, but we're not official, just because. We haven't really talked about it. I guess i'm okay with it. I wouldn't mind making it official but i'm not going to bring it up until i feel i should. Once i transfer to Kennesaw or we can work out to seeing each other more than four months at a time, i think it'll be time to make it official, but right now, i'm just thankful i have him in my life and i'm not going to do anything to screw it up. (:

I hate i always do this.

I swear it's a cycle that keeps happening and i want it to stop. I know any minute, things will be back to normal and i'll be happy again but then again, i know weeks later, it'll go right back to how it now. crappy. terribly crappy. One day, the cycle has to stop and the crap has to go away but when is that going to ever happen?! I know when i transfer, things will be fine but that's a freaking year from now. I cannot keep doing this for a whole year. So, somehow i have to figure out how to fix things where everyone is satisfied. I have no idea how it'll happen, but it has to. It just has to happen. I know none of you will understand what i'm talking about, but just venting helps. It really does and i thank you all.

I hope you make someone smile.

Day twenty two

Day 22: Your favorite book series

HAND DOWN, FUCKING HARRY POTTER!!

Forgive me.

I've missed like ten days in the 30 day challange. I'll just start from the one i like the most...

day fourteen

Day 14: A letter to an inanimate object you love

Dear bobby the blackberry,

Thank you for being so wonderful and helpful. I know we've had our times where you were really pmsing and didn't want to cooperate with me, but you always seem to have my back and i am forever grateful. It is sad to know i will have to let you go in a couple weeks, but i have to move on to bigger and better things. It's time i upgrade to a different blackberry. You were a great blackberry that got me started into the blackberry world, but it's time i set you free! Hopefully you will bring someone as much joy as you brought me. I will love you forever and always!!

-Briana

day thirteen

Day 13: Your favorite movie

hands down, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

day twelve

Day 12: five people that mean a lot to you

1. My mom, of course. I wouldn't be the person i am without her wisdom and guidance.

2. Bianca, my sister. She's gotten me out of a lot and i'll be forever grateful, plus i don't think i would be half as funny if i didn't have her in my life.

3. Ryan. He's the best friend i fell in love with. I can't picture us with anyone else. Our weirdness just fits perfectly together. haha

4. Mia! Ryan might be the love of my life, but Mia is my soul mate. What i lack, she makes up for. We sorta have the same brain. It's magical.

5. Holly, last but certainly not least! Most people might not understand her ways, but she has the biggest heart of anyone i know. Even when you don't think you need help, you do, and she knows. It's kinda creepy actually how she knows those things..but i'm forever grateful for everything she does!

day ten and eleven

i'm so behind! haha

Day 10&11: The meaning behind your Tumblr name. A picture of somewhere you want to visit.

My tumblr name is just my name. hahaha

I want to get married in Italy. It would be amazing!

day eight&nine

Day eight is a post about tumblr so i'm just going to skip it and do only day nine of here.

Day 9: Plans/dreams/goals you have.

My plans changed seriously every year, but as of now my plan is this will be my last full year at Georgia Southwestern. I'll then transfer to either CSU or KSU. I'm thinking of instead of getting a degree in music w/ teacher certification, i'll get a dergee is music theory w/ the teacher certification. It won't take as long, plus i'm in love with theory. After i get my undergrad, i'm going to grad school, NOT in the United States. I have like a list of six different schools i'm interested in. My top choices are schools in Hong Kong, The Netherlands, Berlin, and Australia. I cannot wait to start researching more and hopefully visiting. If Ryan and i are still together, which we most likely will be haha, i'll definitely most likely go where he's going. Just makes sense. I just want to travel the world, playing music, being with the love of my life. That's all. It's that simple.

day seven

Day 7: A habit you wish you didn't have

I have a lot of habits i wish i didn't have actually, but if i had to pick one, it would probably be over thinking every situation. I over analyze pretty much everything and it keeps me on edge, which i hate. I'm getting better at it, but i want to be fully over it pretty soon. Patience!!

day six

Day 6: A picture of someone you look up to, and why.

my mom and sister. two of the most amazing people i know. they've influenced me so much and i hope to one day, be as smart, talented, and wonderful as them.

wouldn't it be nice?

can you tell i miss Ryan?! haha

day five

Day 5- 10 dislikes & likes

dislikes
1. UGA
2. wearing glasses
3. always being sick
4. milk
5. golf
6. odd numbers
7. being away from Ryan
8. MATH
9. Handel
10. being broke

likes
1. my blackberry
2. John Mayer
3. sleeping
4. fall
5. Mendelssohn
6. Ryan
7. asian people
8. the office
9. my job
10. being happy (:

day four

Day 4- 3 places you want to visit

1. China. I'm going either this December or next summer. Super excited!
2. Austalia. Ever since that Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen movie, i've wanted to go! I'm also looking at a grad school in Sydney.
3. UK. I want to go back packing around the United Kingdom as an extended honeymoon type deal. It would be fantastic.

day three

Day 3: A letter to someone. Anyone.

Dear Ryan,
This is actually harder than i thought it would be. Thank you...yep. That's all i have. Seriously, thank you for everything. I know we joke around most of the time, (which i love) but i'm extremely thankful for you. For ten months, i didn't have my best friend. It was one of the hardest things i had to do, but i got through it. Without you. I made myself better, but i always keep in the back of my mind that once i got better, we would too. Guess what happened? :) I know things aren't really certain with the little time we see each other but i do know i never want to spend another day knowing you're with someone else. You're my best friend who i just so happen to sorta kinda love...a lot. I know i was always told to live in the present. Don't dwell on the past, but i'm so excited for the future. We have so many more memories to make and i cannot wait. This is sorta strange writing a letter that i know you'll never see but i guess it's sorta therapeutic. I just can't wait. Again, thank you. I'm so blessed and i wouldn't change anything that has happened over the past year because it just makes me even more thankful for everything i have. Now, hurry up and get back from China so i can see you!!

P.S. Don't forget my key chain!

P.S.S. and the chinese hooker!!

Wo ai ni, Briana <3

day two

Day 2: Your favorite color, and why

pink and yellow!

they're rad colors! WHY NOT?!

SONG OF THE WEEK!

I normally post song of the week on Sunday, but what the heck.

Good Life - One Republic

finally

I've been using that word a lot lately. Finally the semester is over. Finally i'm getting happy. Finally i understand how all that pain was useful. It's lame and rad at the same time, but i'm finally at that fucking light at the end of the tunnel. Besides my parents being complete douche bags, i plan to enjoy my 18 left at home. Ryan is in China right now, which is super fucking awesome. I need to email him actually. I didn't get to talk to him yesterday. :( I'm keeping my fingers crossed our plan of seeing each other when he gets back and before i leave isn't ruined by my parents! Other things being ruined, a certain friendship. It sucks hardcore. A lot of things changed over a month with us and it just sucks our friendship was the one thing that isn't working out. I don't plan to sacrifice my relationship, to make him happy. I'm finally happy and if he doesn't like how things happened, i can't do anything but to leave him be. Hopefully he comes around eventually. Just not too late...I started researching grad schools in Europe yesterday! It's so exciting!! My mom has no idea i want to do this and i don't plan to tell her until i get accepted. Ryan's favorite is Berlin but mine is England so we'll have to compromise somehow. :p Ugh! I used to hate those stupid smiles but now i can't stop using them because of Ry! Now that i've babbled on and on about my past three months, The Office is going to consume my entire afternoon. Speaking of The Office, i noticed Pam and Jim's relationship reminds me of mine and Ryan. It's just so chill. They're just best friends who happen to be in love with each other. I love it.

I hope you all find a best friend that you fall in love with.

Have a great day and make someone smile.

day one

30 DAY CHALLENGE

It started yesterday but since blogspot wasn't working, i had to post it on tumblr. So i'll have two posts today! Also, forgive me for not blogging a lot anymore, schools out, i promise i'll blog again, possibly later today!

Day 1: A picture of you and ten random facts
1. I bite my nails.
2. I hate popcorn.
3. I’m a music student.
4. I have OCD.
5. I have a gay, purple blackberry named bobby.
6. I’m an orientation leader at my school.
7. I’m part of the LGBT&S Alliance at my school.
8. I hate odd numbers..#4 explains why.
9. I don’t plan to stay in the US after i finish my undergraduate degree.
10. I hate shoes.

SONG OF THE WEEK!

JOHN MAYER

COMFORTABLE

..sorry i couldn't find a better video or a good live version. This isn't one of his most popular songs but it's one of my favorites.

MONTH OF HELL.

You remember in my last post when i said April would be hell? I was completely correct. My procrastination has gotten terrible and i'm buried in random assignments and miscellaneous tasks. Arts in the Park is this Saturday and i'm performing two songs...that i haven't looked at and i'm suppose to play perfectly tomorrow morning during my lesson. Like my mom said, i work well under pressure, so i'm sure it'll turn out great. It's kinda weird how my mom knows when something is wrong. I'm beyond stressed about everything. I get the test results back about my surgery on Friday. I'm preparing for the worst and hoping for the best. It seems to always work well when i go for that strategy. My mom says if it was bad, they would have already called by now, so hopefully she's right! Ryan and i went through our schedules and it turns out we won't be able to see each other until close to the end of fall semester. So, that's seven months at least until i see him. It sucks but i mean, we went ten months without talking at all, so i have to look at the bright side. That's the only way i'll get through these seven months! Enough of my ranting!

I hope you all have a fabulous week and make someone smile. (:

SONG OF THE WEEK!

Moving Pictures, Silent Films

Great Lake Swimmers

Three weeks of ridiculousness

I can't believe it's been three weeks since i've blogged. It's quite depressing and makes me realize maybe that's why i've been sorta sad lately. I had a mini life crisis last night! I was just laying, thinking why the heck does the same thing happen every week. Class,Work,Practice,Sleep. Everyday, that's how it goes. The weekends aren't really much more exciting. Hanging out at The Felder House, drinking, and sleeping. That pretty much sums up my schedule for the entire seven days, then repeat. I want something new! It's weird because the whole time Ryan and i weren't together, i was sad and it was something that keep me guessing what was going to happen the next day and now that Ryan and i are sorta together, i'm happy. Really happy, and the happiness is starting to just sorta fade behind the bore of what my life has become. Don't get me wrong, i'm beyond happy how things are now, but i just need more. Maybe that's me being a tad selfish but i don't know. This new thing is going to have to wait a couple weeks because i'm way too busy. Piano Proficiency, Juries, and Finals to study for and also get ready to move out of the dorms and into my new house. Maybe once May comes, things will brighten up!

I hope you all have a great week and make someone smile. (:

SONG OF THE WEEK!

This is only the beginning..

This week was just strange all together. I'm so confused with everything, but i'm happy if that makes any sense. I'm being tested on my patience with this whole situation and i really just want to speed everything up already, but i can't. I'm just hoping that this time around, it works. My god, you have no idea how much i want this to work out. I really wish my friends understood where i'm coming from with this whole situation but i know they had to see me go through a terrible time and for me to want to risk going back in that whole situation, is stupid, but i really think this is going to be good for me. I'm putting everything into it and hopefully it'll turn out in my favor. I have yet to deal with the other situation but i know sooner or later, i'll have to. Right now, i choose later. Thank you for listen to me babble on and on about how ridiculously confusing my life is right now. If only you knew everything that was going on..

I hope you all have a great week and make someone smile.

SONG OF THE WEEK!

"Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do."

I don't think it's normal to be faced with the same situation twice, but i guess i should get it right this time. I'm an indecisive person, so having to choose between two things is not my forte, especially when the two things are people. I made the wrong one last time but got a second chance. I don't think lady luck will be on my side this time, so i better make the right choice the first time. I really should make a pros and cons flow chart. That sounds so dumb, i know, but my head is completely scattered. You know, i really shouldn't make a decision at all. Let time work everything out? That sounds even worse. This blog is useless but i'm posting it anyway. It's as messed up as my head is right now. One good thing is, i'm actually excited about tomorrow. I've always said nothing will top last years valentine's day and this year will be shit because Ryan and i aren't together anymore, but thankfully and hopefully that will change. I'm partying with my favorite people and forgetting about the depressing part! I promise next week's blog will be better. Please forgive me. I hope you all have a fantastic week and enjoy your valentine's day.

2.6.10

I think it's been three weeks since the last time i actually blogged. I'm never near a computer anymore and i should find that an accomplishment but i just feel so behind on everything! I mean my social life is has improved but i miss blogging so somehow, I'll have to find a balance of both. I've decided i have two more months of freedom, then comes my hell month. April will consist of me studying for finals, practicing for juries, and trying not to kill myself before my piano proficiency exam. I don't think it's hit me yet how stressed I'll be in April, but I'm enjoying the carefree mindset i have right now. I've kinda gotten into a weekly routine that works so well. Class and work consume my week. Drinking, playing skip-bo, and surrounding myself around amazing people consume my weekends. It took long enough, but I'm finally happy with my life. I just want to stay in this moment forever but i also want things to get even better. Someone who i admire greatly posted a quote on his twitter that i can't seem to forget about. I hope you guys fall in love with it just as much as i have. Enjoy your week. Make someone smile.

"Because the only people that interest me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones that never yawn or say a commonplace thing.. but burn, burn, burn like roman candles across the night."

SONG OF THE WEEK!

Forgive me, i've been so happy.

Please forgive me for never blogging.
Also forgive me for saying i'm going to blog and never do it. I promise i will blog by Sunday. PROMISE!
Have a fabulous weekend. (:

I cried like a freakin' baby.

“If we listened to our intellect, we’d never have a love affair. We’d never have a friendship. We’d never go into business, because we’d be cynical. Well, that’s nonsense. You’ve got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down.”

LET GO.

Understand that there is no benefit holding on to

heartache, regret, or hatred towards another person,

no matter what they did to you.

I know you probably hate them right now, but there is still no benefit.

Realize that, although it is over,

your relationship with them was unique and it was special in so many ways.

You can cherish and appreciate that.

One of the coolest things is, you can congratulate yourself

because you took the chance and you fell in love.

Millions of people won't even let themselves fall in love but you did.

You were brave enough to take that risk and although love didn't work out this time,

 THERE WILL BE A NEXT TIME.

Most importantly,

if you're in a revenge seeking mood, the best revenge

 is to live well and be caught doing that daily.

Life moves on.

With or without you.

I hope you join in.

Happy 2011!

“Life is one big road with lots of signs. Don’t complicate your mind. Flee from hate, mischief and jealousy. Don’t bury your thoughts, put your vision to reality. Wake up and live.”

-Bob Marley